Friday, June 30, 2006
Allied ambassadors told to stay away from shrine!
Read this Fcuk you Tojo!-Slanty eyed,hypocritical,short-arse tossers!
French bashing-Why-They eat snails!
Why don't Master Card and Visa work well in France?
They don't know how to say "Charge!"
They don't know how to say "Charge!"
Field manual-Combat training with pistols!
Ban Landmines now!
Book Review - Gates of Fire by Steven Pressfield
Read this What a book!The story of The Battle of Thermopylae,Ancient Greece,where 300 Spartans held a pass against an entire Persian army of more than a million men for three days and nights.Told in the words of the only survivor in the form of a diary.An Awsome read!
"Tell the Spartans,stranger passing by,
that here obedient to their laws we lie."
(Taken from the Spartan monument at Thermopylae)
"Tell the Spartans,stranger passing by,
that here obedient to their laws we lie."
(Taken from the Spartan monument at Thermopylae)
Hope he was wearing his seat belt!
Bloody Battle of the Somme remembered, 90 years on
Read this we will remember them.
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
John McCrae(1872-1918)
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
John McCrae(1872-1918)
Lifelong dream come true for British astronaut
On this day
1934-TheNight of the Long Knives Adolf Hitler's violent purge of his political rivals in Germany, takes place.
1936-Gone with the Windby Margaret Mitchell published
1997-China resumes sovereignty over the city-state of Hong Kong ending 156 years of British colonial rule.
1936-Gone with the Windby Margaret Mitchell published
1997-China resumes sovereignty over the city-state of Hong Kong ending 156 years of British colonial rule.
Suicide bomber gets his just reward!
Wing Commander 'Grumpy' Unwin DSO,DFM and Bar
Read this Goodbye to one of the few.
The gratitude of every home in our Island, in our Empire, and indeed throughout the world, except in the abodes of the guilty, goes out to the British airmen who, undaunted by odds, unwearied in their constant challenge and mortal danger, are turning the tide of the world war by their prowess and by their devotion. Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.
Winston Churchill 1940
The gratitude of every home in our Island, in our Empire, and indeed throughout the world, except in the abodes of the guilty, goes out to the British airmen who, undaunted by odds, unwearied in their constant challenge and mortal danger, are turning the tide of the world war by their prowess and by their devotion. Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.
Winston Churchill 1940
African five get a map to freedom
Argentina renews campaign over Falklands claim
The two Ronnies-Fork Handles
Thursday, June 29, 2006
The Nemo Document of Comprehensive Mujahid Training for Jihad Explosives, Poisons, Physical Preparation, Nuclear Weapons, and Guns!
Read this The very fact that this type of information is readily available is terrifying!
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
The right call on Everest
Thought of the day
why can't women understand that having a joint bank account is a very bad idear because knowing how much I spend on ciggies and booze will only cause a row so best not do it then!
This is the danger our troops face every day-Suicide bombing on cctv
Changes your opinion of the war when you see this first hand dosen't it?!
Soldiers' wives receiving death threats from Iraq!
Read this Spineless cowards!These "Soldiers of Allah" show their true selves by these "Brave" phonecalls,scareing innocent women and children,what hypocrites,call themselves religious-brainwashed,medieval,pathetic,small-minded,bullys more like!
How to be really offensive: this dictionary will tell you!
Read this Excellent idear!-The Oxford English dictionary should be ammended emediately!
French bashing-why-They wear stripy shirts and berets!
Book review- One Bullet Away by Nathaniel fick
Read this What an excellent book!-The story of US Marine officer Nathaniel Ficks' service from basic training through to combat in Afganistan and Iraq,told in his own words.Gritty realism and gut wrenching detail will put you down on your belt buckle experiencing what it's like to be under fire with the USMCs finest.
On this day
1098-Fighters of the First Crusade defeat Kerbogha of Mosul-And over 1000 years later we're doing it again!
1914- Franz FerdinandArchduke of Austria and his wife Sophia are assassinated in Sarajevo by young Serbian nationalist Gavrilo Princip , the casus belli of World War I.
1919-The Treaty of Versailles is signed, ending World War I with Germany.
1914- Franz FerdinandArchduke of Austria and his wife Sophia are assassinated in Sarajevo by young Serbian nationalist Gavrilo Princip , the casus belli of World War I.
1919-The Treaty of Versailles is signed, ending World War I with Germany.
Monty Python-Hitler in England
Hirst's pickled shark is rotting and needs to be replaced. Should it still be worth £6.5m?
Read this Let's just pickle the talentless twat who made it!-I'd pay to see him in a big jar!
RAF woman killed in Iraq is honoured
Read this sleep in peace Sarah
If I should die, think only this of me:
That there's some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever England. There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;
A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,
Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,
A body of England's, breathing English air,
Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away,
A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
Gives somewhere back the thoughts by England given;
Her sights and sounds; dreams happy as her day;
And laughter, learnt of friends; and gentleness,
In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.
By Rupert Brooke(1887-1915)
If I should die, think only this of me:
That there's some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever England. There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;
A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,
Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,
A body of England's, breathing English air,
Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away,
A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
Gives somewhere back the thoughts by England given;
Her sights and sounds; dreams happy as her day;
And laughter, learnt of friends; and gentleness,
In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.
By Rupert Brooke(1887-1915)
Immigrants 'swamping' council services
Read this what a surprise-We need to shut the door now before its too late!
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Behind the fridge
Dung sale to save elephants
VC heroes mark 150 years of selfless bravery
Wallcott arested!
The precision-made mine that has 'killed 17 British troops'
Read this The discovery of this mine highlights the fact that the British Army MUST relace the"Snatch" armoured landrover asap or suffer many more casualties as a result.Having used the snatch myself during my tour in Iraq in 2004,I found it totaly useless for the job-The armour's crap-it wouldn't stop an air rifle!It's top heavy,hard on the brakes,the driver and commander can't see fuck all,the topcover have limited manouverbility due to the pathetically small top hatch,the air-con is almost non-existant,the back doors are a bastard to open and close,the back seats were designed by a sadist,you can't use a gps inside 'cos there's no signal and they won't give us remote antenas,and there are no cigarete lighters!Scrap it and give us armoured personel carriers like the rest of the world use!
Peckish Poles 'pinch Britain's carp'!
Read this Fishy or what?-Now the bastards are stealing our fish!(I don't want to keep "Carping" on about it!)
Two British soldiers killed in Afghan ambush
Read this How many more?
What passing bells for these who die as cattle?
Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries for them; no prayers nor bells,
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,-
The shrill,demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.
What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes.
The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.
Wilfred Owen(1893-1918)
What passing bells for these who die as cattle?
Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries for them; no prayers nor bells,
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,-
The shrill,demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.
What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes.
The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.
Wilfred Owen(1893-1918)
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Leaving on a jet plane!
I'm off to Barcelona for the weekend,aint life a bitch!so no blogging until monday,enjoy the rain! Scipio
Renegade platoon
Book review-Death to the French by C.S.Forester
Read this Excellent book!Set in Portugal during the Peningsular war,telling the story of Rifleman Dodd,of the 95th Rifles,who,after getting seperated from his regiment,starts a guerilla war single handed against the French.
Slaver's descendant begs forgiveness
Read this Bring back slavery!Everyone should own at least one!
DVLA sacks 14 employees after e-mail porn freezes its computer!
Read this Hilarious!Proof positive that they're not all nerds at the DVLA!
Higher
Blind diver reaches record depths!
Prescott in losing battle with chip on his shoulder!
Read this When is the fat,useless nortern git going to resign?
Pilfering mint worker filled his boots with A$135,000!
Monty Python-The accountant
Fury after Australians shoot Iraqi bodyguard!
Read this Idiots!-Don't they have "Rules of Engagement" in oz?
French bashing
What English word has no equivalent in the French language?
Gratitude!
Gratitude!
On this day
1812-Napoleonic wars Napoleon invades Russia
1893-The Royal Navy battleship HMS Camperdown accidentally rams the British Mediterranean Fleet flagshipHMS Vitoriawhich sinks taking 358 crew with her, including the fleet's commander, Vice-Admiral Sir George Tryon.
1911-George V is crowned King of the United Kingdom, succeeding his father, Edward VII
1941- Nazi Germany invades the Soviet Union in Operation Barbarossaone of the most dramatic turning points of World War II.
1893-The Royal Navy battleship HMS Camperdown accidentally rams the British Mediterranean Fleet flagshipHMS Vitoriawhich sinks taking 358 crew with her, including the fleet's commander, Vice-Admiral Sir George Tryon.
1911-George V is crowned King of the United Kingdom, succeeding his father, Edward VII
1941- Nazi Germany invades the Soviet Union in Operation Barbarossaone of the most dramatic turning points of World War II.
Army's newest recruit to combat Islamic squirrels!
Would you like ice with your lager? The beer that is served at -2.5C
UK parking system a mess
The Germans own our water!
Read this The Boshe own our water-Churchill will be turning in his grave!!!
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Park wardens awarded new powers over litter offenders!
Army phrases you'd rather not hear!
The Americans will be providing the close air support.
You're posted to Tidworth
Fix bayonets
Your new Troop Sgt has just done P company(Para selection)
Leave is cancelled
Your dad is fcuking your sister
Pick up the log
March to the time I call out
Do you accept my award
It's character building
I'm sorry, Sir, but I've had to remove your penis and both your testicles
We've always done it that way!
You are cordially invited to the 3 Para Mortar Platoon Rohypnol Party
My office. Now.
Move to Grid 12345678 where the helicopters will pick you up at 0300.
Do you have anything planned for leave?
It's your turn to blow the blind grenade.
OK, integrity question, did you do it?
I think it's yours
Crack, Crack, Ping, Ping, THUMP.
Sunray is down.
Breaking into double time
Taking you a stage further in your foot drill......... I left you in this position
Reveille 05 early hours and Drill until NAAFI break
Contact, wait..out.
Follow me, it's a short cut.
Of course the Claymore is pointing away from us...er..which way are WE pointing ?
Good effort lads, outstanding entry drills, but it's the wrong house.
He's waking up, pass the KY, it's better when they fight back.
GAS GAS GAS
The RMP are in the block
You feature rather a lot in the Christmas duty list
I forgot to tell you, I've got herpes
You will need this opened umberella dragged from your piss slit
Don't make plans for the weekend
The PRE team have just come through the gates
You'll get it in theatre
Is that it?
We're all out of them, fill out all these forms and we will indent for them.
It's your round.
Too slow, do it again!
Standby....
Mr Vice...that'll be a bottle of port
You're in your own time now.
My tea's a salad.
Sh1t roles down hill.
Bug out!!!
Standby your beds!
You're up first. Now.
It's either cancer or penile warts.
The RSM wants your feet in his intray NOW.
Tony needs something to whip up voter support and he's decided on another war.
We're giving free lighters to Labour peers.
Right, lads, this one's a silent breach.
Bend over. This may smart a bit!
We need a decoy....
You shure got a prurty mouth.....
If it ain't raining it ain't training.
Soldier, I'm the Platoon Commander, I should have the map.
Right-ho chaps, I know where we are, follow me!
(Retrieved from "http://www.arrse.co.uk/wiki/Phrases_you%27d_rather_not_hear")
Book review- Blackhawk Down by Mark Bowden
Read this If you've seen the film the book will just blow you away!The true story of a mission gone wrong in Mogadishu,Somalia in 1993-140 of Americas most elite troops are surrounded by thousands of heavily armed rebel nutters and have to fight their way out!READ THIS BOOK!
IED on Humvee
French bashing-Why-Have you ever met one?
The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?",but rather "How long until France surrenders?"
Beware of the "Codfather"!!
Men behaving badly -or is it just a gene?
Read this My jeans are Calvin Klein,what does that make me?
Peter Cook-Shelly Winters
On this day
1813-Wellingtons' army defeats the French at the Battle of Vitoria in thePeninsular war -And we've been beating them ever since!
1854-First Victoria Cross won during bombardment of Bomarsund in the Aland Islands.
1940-France surrenders to Germany inWorld war 2 Again!
1942-Tobruk falls toGerman forces Not for long!
1854-First Victoria Cross won during bombardment of Bomarsund in the Aland Islands.
1940-France surrenders to Germany inWorld war 2 Again!
1942-Tobruk falls toGerman forces Not for long!
Para risked his life to save US soldier hurt in Taliban attack
Big bang!
Illegals set free at airports!
Read this An utter discrace!How many of these "Illegals" are terrorists?The "Politburo" is completly failing to control our borders and protect us from the scum of Europe,and the rest of the world, who are forcing their medieval warped ideals and beliefs on us!We MUST have proper border control and know the identity and history of every person who enters this country and those who are not fit to live here should be sent back on the next available plane/Banana boat!
Smoking ban is extended to doorways and bus shelters!
Read this Barking mad!The "Health and Safety Nazis" strike again!I'm not a smoker but you've got to let the cancer club spark up somwhere!
Poppies return to make a red and pleasant land
Read this "Englands red and pleasant land" dosn't have the same ring to it!
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Attack on Humvees
After 60 years of shame, Germany flies the flag again!
Read this They'll be shaking the moth balls out of their jackboots and re-fueling the "Tigers" next!
Book review-The Sharpe series by Bernard Cornwell
Read this Excellent series of books!Real old fashioned,rip rawing adventure which both swashles and bucks through the Peninsular war following the life of Richard Sharpe,an officer of the 95th Rifles,in Wellingtons' army,who rose from the ranks and is a total nutter!
French bashing-Why?Because they're there!
What's the difference between a Frenchman and a Catfish?
One is an ugly,scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other one is a fish!
One is an ugly,scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other one is a fish!
Najaf snipers
Taleban use children as shields to fight British!
Read this Cowards!And this is the way these "Soldiers of Allah" fight their"Jihad" dosen't seem very holy to me!Come out and fight us like a man,you pathetic,brainwashed,medieval,spineless hippocrites!
Arctic mountain to be Noah's Ark for world's seeds!
Read this I'd like to book a room there,on suite,not too near the pool!
A little less conversation
Thanks to Jonathan "Alphabet" Arciga,5/7 Cav.Mortar plt.United States Army
Death of a true hero-Wing Commander Nicky Barr
Border security 'too lax to discourage terrorists!'
Read this No shit Sherlock!Tell us something we don't already know!
On this day
451AD-Flavius Aetius and his Roman legions defeats Attila the Hun at the Battle of Chalons He was a "Hot cross Hun!"
1837-Queen Victoria suceeds to the British throne She was amused!
1877-Alexander Graham Bell installs world's first commercial telephone service in Hamilton,Ontario,Canada
1837-Queen Victoria suceeds to the British throne She was amused!
1877-Alexander Graham Bell installs world's first commercial telephone service in Hamilton,Ontario,Canada
Monty Python-Argument clinic
British troops pulled out of Iraqi province
When husbands are forced to rent out their wives to feed the family!
Read thisExcellent idear-We should have it here!Where do I get a catalouge?
Japan to withdraw troops from Iraq
Monday, June 19, 2006
Talk to me!
I need to know what you think!Please comment on what I say,even if it's obscene,so I know there's life out there!
VCP big style!
VCP(Vehicle check point)If only we could have tank support in Northern Ireland-The bad guys would soon wind their necks in!
(Photo taken by Scipio,route Hexamin,West of Basra,Iraq June 2004)
Rant of the day-I hate football!
I hate football!Am I the only Englishman alive who finds this pointless,moronic game about as apealing as having your wisdom teeth removed without anesthetic!It's boring,boring,boring!Fouteen GROSSLY overpaid pamperd,brainded idiots run around a beutifly tailored grass field for ninety minutes,occasionaly perfoming oscar nominated acts of total fantasy when an oposing player just happens to breath on them resulting in a death scene reminisant of Shakespere!
These tossers earn millions for kicking a round object about and every now and again get it in the goal!For this lofty privalege they are allowed to get away with rape,buggery,speeding,drug taking,GBH and any number of anti-social acts that if a mere mortal like ourselves was to commit you could guarantee us "Standing tall in front of the man"the very next Court opening day!
They are recruited young,sometimes when they're still in school,Having never done a days proper work in their lives and handed a silver spoon and a "Get out of jail free card" which they can use for the rest of their lives.
I admit the original concept of the game,when it was first invented,had promise, but these days money is God."Ductus Exemplo"-Leadership by example should be the proffesional footballers moto,unfortunately it seems to be"Do whatever I like because my million pound lawyer will get me off it!"
If ever these pamperd neanderthows start to show real heart and honour,like you see on the Rugby field,a proper game,I might take an interest but for the time being I think I'll just go and have a barbed wire enema instead!!!
These tossers earn millions for kicking a round object about and every now and again get it in the goal!For this lofty privalege they are allowed to get away with rape,buggery,speeding,drug taking,GBH and any number of anti-social acts that if a mere mortal like ourselves was to commit you could guarantee us "Standing tall in front of the man"the very next Court opening day!
They are recruited young,sometimes when they're still in school,Having never done a days proper work in their lives and handed a silver spoon and a "Get out of jail free card" which they can use for the rest of their lives.
I admit the original concept of the game,when it was first invented,had promise, but these days money is God."Ductus Exemplo"-Leadership by example should be the proffesional footballers moto,unfortunately it seems to be"Do whatever I like because my million pound lawyer will get me off it!"
If ever these pamperd neanderthows start to show real heart and honour,like you see on the Rugby field,a proper game,I might take an interest but for the time being I think I'll just go and have a barbed wire enema instead!!!
Teenage waistland(Warning-Very graphic!)
Book review-The Conquest of Gaul by Julius Caesar
Read thisUnreal book-Reads like an adventure novel written over 2000 years ago by Julius Caesar,General,Emperor and total nutter!It tells the "True"story(History is always written by the victors!)of Caesar's campaign in Gaul,modern day Europe, between 58 and 50BC,which resulted in over a "million" dead.Fascinating read.
It's time to curb gun trade, says man who invented the AK47!
Read thisProbably shouldn't have invented it then!!!
The AK 74 instruction manual(For the Dragunov sniper rifle-a variant of the AK with the same working parts)
The AK 74 instruction manual(For the Dragunov sniper rifle-a variant of the AK with the same working parts)
A forgotten monument to the blackest days of empire!
Read thisSeems to me the only black hole is India's reluctance to admit it ever happened!
101st Airborne
Thanks to the 101st Airborne Division,United States Army,WhoArhh!!!
Licence to spill: Labour MP soaks his borders as nearby gardens turn brown!
Read this"Ductus Exemplo"(Leadership by example)Appaling-What a hippocrite!We've come to expect this sort of behaviour from members of Blair's "Politburo",the sooner they're all booted out of office and a proper government,who puts Britain and the Britsh peoples' interests first,instead of giving away our hard fought rights to an unelected body of "PC" Nazis(The EU)and allowing the scum of Europe to settle in this country,creating non-British ghettoes full of hate-preaching,anti-Christian,brainwashed lunatics who do not live by our values or religion,do not obey or regognise our laws and are destroying the very fabric of this once great land!
French bashing
What's the new French flag look like?
A white cross emblazoned on a white background!
A white cross emblazoned on a white background!
On this day
1846-The first Baseball game played in Hoboken,New Jersey
1862-US Congress prohibits Slavery in the United States of America
1861-Field Marshall Douglas Haig born-The"Butcher of the Somme"
1862-US Congress prohibits Slavery in the United States of America
1861-Field Marshall Douglas Haig born-The"Butcher of the Somme"
Airborne Gladiators
With thanks to the 3rd Battalion,The Parachute Regiment for their stirling work in Afganistan over the last few days-Well done lads!
The Enemy within!
Read thisWhat a stupid idear-Let's invite the enemy into the police,what's next-Taliban tours around the Houses of Parlament?!
Paras strike deep into the Taliban heartland
The owl with an alarming wake-up call!
Read thisOwls that!You'd think with the amount of shotguns owned out in carrot cruncher land that the solution is simple!
Whales
Can't sleep? Have a glass of red wine!l
Read thisExcellent-I'll have a large glass of Shiraz please!
Reid pledges to reveal whereabouts of paedophiles!
Read thisAbout time to-Will they also supply the petrol bombs required or do we have to make them ourselves?!
Shortage of homes 'fuelled by migrants'!
Read thisNot only are the spongeing scumbags taking our money and clogging up the NHS with their dirty foreign diseases they're now stealing our houses to!!Kick the whole malingering lot of them out of our country,back to the cesspool they came from!
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Body armour works!
Pass this test, Dutch tell immigrants !
French bashing
Book review-My war by Colby Buzzell
Read thisExcellent book!The diary of an American soldier in Iraq-READ THIS BOOK!
Dragunov-Death from afar!
On this day
1815-Napolean defeated at the Battle of WaterlooJust along from Kennington!
1940-"Finest hour"speech byWinston ChurchillNever was so much owed by so many to so few!
1942-Sir Paul McCartney wasbornDidn't he used to be in a band?
1940-"Finest hour"speech byWinston ChurchillNever was so much owed by so many to so few!
1942-Sir Paul McCartney wasbornDidn't he used to be in a band?
Ayatollah's grandson calls for US overthrow of Iran
Read this There's a good idear-Lets start another war we can't win!
Why every home in Britain should have a Taser gun!
Rock the Basra
My companies video!
I'm the one with the "Dragonov"sniper rifle!(A whole one second in the vid!)
Saturday, June 17, 2006
The story of the photo
The reason that there are only three British soldiers in the picture is because the fourth team member,Colin,the driver was in shaiba feild hospital when this photo was taken,the day after the contact.He had sustained multiple fractures of the left leg and was lucky to be alive-As we all were!We kidnapped him from hospital a day later and brought him back to camp for a piss up!
The story of the photo-On the sixteenth of June 2004 my section,two section,five platoon(Royal Green Jackets)Messines Company,The London Regiment(TA) was tasked to escort several ATO(Ammunition Technical Officers-Bomb disposal nutters!)to two ex Iraqi Army ammo dumps to check if the Royal Engineers,who had allegedly blown them,had done the job properly.The dumps were located ten to fiften Kilometers north of Basra,just off route six.The intelligence on the area was sketchy at best,with no major threat to where we were going(Apart from the usual "Islamalunes" trying to kill us!),so we all thought it would be a bit of a "jolly"-Take a camera,get some lairy pics of bits of ammo and blown up shit and "large it"about what heroes we were when we got back.We were wrong-Intellegence was bollocks!
We set off first thing in the morning,two "green vehicles"(Wolf landrovers,unarmoured and totally useless for the job)and two "whitefleet"(Civie four by fours-even more unarmoured and totally bollocks for the job!)Matt,the section commander,took the lead in "Green one",with "White one" and "two" behind and my wagon "Green two"bringing up the rear.I was section second in command and also the only Team Medic.
We hoofed it through the north of Basra,hard,fast and aggresive as were our SOPs(Standard Operational Procedures)and made good time to the first "ammo dump" however it was not what we expected!It was approx. three hundred meters of a main road,near civvie houses and was basically a load of sand berms,bulldozed into crude squares with every conceivable bomb,bullet,grenade,rocket,shell scattered about in a "Have'nt realy been blown up very well by the Royal Engineers stylee!"It was completely deserted so any would be bad guy could happily come and shop for things that go bang whenever he wanted,unmolested.This did not impress me!
There was no real track plan so the ATO nutters,who had been there before,took the lead using their Gps(Global positioning system-I can't be arsed to explain,google it!) to navigate.We spent about half an hour trundling around "Bombs-R-Us"with the ATO lunnies marking plots on their gps and us posing for various "Lairee"photos whilst standing near several thousand tons of unstable,extremely fucking dangerous bang things.We then moved on to "Bombers Homebase" number two.
We carried out the same procedure for about half an hour again and then,with the ATO nutters leading,started to make our way out.There was a gap in the outer berm which the first two vehicles cleared ok and then it was Matts' turn.I was about thirty meters behind when Green one struck the Anti-Tank mine.
It struck left and forward,lifting the Wolf completely off the ground in a huge black cloud.Matt was thrown out of the right hand passenger door and there was a lot of black smoke.Fuck!"Green one's hit a mine!"I screamed into my radio"Everyone stay where you are"I don't know how I knew it was a mine,I just did.This all took only seconds.I got out of my wagon and told my team to stay where they were and watch their arcs for any bad guys,it was then I realized that I had to take command and go forward.I didn't know if Matt was alive or dead ,but I had to assume the worst, it was obvious that there would be casualties and I was the team medic.It sounds corny but I actually thought"This is where you have to earn your pay"I was shitting myself,"Why me?What sort of injuries are up there?Which of my friends are dead?Who's badly injured?Oh Fuck,this isn't happening"!All these thoughts happend in a heartbeat as I was getting out of the wagon.
I moved forward into the smoke and the first person I saw was Matt staggering back towards me-He was ok,Thank fuck for that!Next came Micky and Sean,the two rear topcover,looking extremely pissed off and shocked but also ok.I asked them if they were alright and sent them back to my wagon.I could hear someone screaming in agony-Oh fuck,Colin, the driver!He was sitting above where the mine struck!I moved round left to the drivers side and saw Rob,my driver,was already there.He didn't have to come forward into the danger zone but he chose to,putting himself at risk,it wasn't his job,(I had to be there,I was the medic and second in command)I was very impressed to see him there.
When I got to the drivers cab Rob was attempting to pull Colin out,but with little success(Too many pies Col!)I lent a hand and between us we pulled him out and carried him forward to "White two" and layed him in the boot where I checked him over.He wasn't in a good way but a lot better than I was expecting-he still had all his bits but his left leg was obviously fucked!(Army medical term!)I immobilised his leg and sent Rob forward to cover one of the ATO nutters who was doing a "John Wayne" with a mine probe,prodding the ground ahead for any more nasty surprises and clearing a way for us out of "Dodge City".
While this was happening Matt had successfully managed to contact help on the radio in the form of a Danish callsign who happend to be passing by,and they arrived shortly after to assist.
One funny incident occured when the casivac chopper was inbound I had a heated argument with Matt over who would throw the signal smoke grenade to call in the chopper(It's every squaddies dream to "Pop smoke" for real)I won by saying I was his medic,he was in shock,so fuck off I'm doing it!
We were shown how realy lucky we were when the ATO nutter cleared the strikezone he found another Anti-tank mine and two anti-personell mines right where we all had been walking,just to the left of Colin's cab-Fuck!Also it didn't exactly impress me when he told us that the last two times they'd visited these ammo dumps they'd struck mines! Could have fucking meationed it before we left camp!!!
That's the story of the photo,my first contact,two years later Colin's leg is still fucked(Army medical term for not better yet!)Matt's now a sergeant,Micky's a civvie and Shauns a nutcase(licking a window somwhere),Rob-who I recomended for a medal and didn't get one(Tight-arssed senior rank tossers!),is still in the TA,me I'm studying to be an alcaholic(not quite there yet but willing to learn!)and also a civie.
Here's an interesting fact
Friday, June 16, 2006
I tried so hard
U.S. death toll in Iraq hits 2,500!
Read this Why?
It is the soldier, not the reporter,
Who preserves the freedom of the press,
And it is the soldier, not the poet,
Who protects our freedom of speech,
It is the soldier, not the campus organiser,
Who puts his life on the line,
To give others the freedom to demonstrate,
And it is the soldier,
Who salutes the flag,
Who serves beneath the flag,
And whose coffin is draped by the flag,
Who protects the protesters right
To burn the flag.
Freedom is NEVER free!
It is the soldier, not the reporter,
Who preserves the freedom of the press,
And it is the soldier, not the poet,
Who protects our freedom of speech,
It is the soldier, not the campus organiser,
Who puts his life on the line,
To give others the freedom to demonstrate,
And it is the soldier,
Who salutes the flag,
Who serves beneath the flag,
And whose coffin is draped by the flag,
Who protects the protesters right
To burn the flag.
Freedom is NEVER free!
Happy two year anniversary Two Three Charlie!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Thought of the day
What's wrong with cutting your toenails in front of the telly?
On sale today in Finsbury Park mosque!
Cameras set to catch side-street speeders!
Read this The "Speed Nazis" strike again!-If I can't speed down my own road where am I supposed to speed then?!
Prison survival guide!
Book review-Last Round by Mark Nicol
Read this The true story of the events leading up to the murder of six British military policemen by a mob of 400 heavily armed Iraqis in Majar Al-Kabir,Iraq in 2003.A MUST read!
Good fire discipline-Not!
Zimbabwe sex workers charge rates in line with inflation!
Read this Thank fcuk I can only last 30 seconds-I'd be bankruped!!!
Iraq invasion is blamed as thousands resign from TA
Read this Not a surprise-I'm one of them(Though I did a tour in Iraq first)!!!
French bashing
Question:Why do the French call their fighter plane the"Mirage"?
Answer:'cos it dosn't really exist!
Answer:'cos it dosn't really exist!
USMC
Gays-only cruise on the QM2!
Karate kid, 12, breaks 15 stone mugger's nose!
On this day
1215-King John puts his seal on theMagna Carta
1775-Gerge Washington is appointed commander in chief of the Continental Army
1996-Ella Fitzgerald"The First Lady of Song"died
1775-Gerge Washington is appointed commander in chief of the Continental Army
1996-Ella Fitzgerald"The First Lady of Song"died
Monty Python-The Parrot sketch
Bugs Bunny gun sparks airport security scare
Head lice 'are becoming indestructible'!
Estate agent sells land on the moon!
Read this I've just bought a beach house by the sea of tranquility!
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Charlie Co.
US Army
British soldier died as he saved comrade in Taleban ambush
Read this A truly brave man-He deserves a decoration
I dreamed kind Jesus fouled the big-gun gears;
And caused a permanent stoppage in all bolts;
And buckled with a smile Mausers and Colts;
And rusted bayonet with His tears.
And there were no more bombs, of ours or Theirs,
Not even an old flint-lock, nor even a pikel.
But God was vexed, and gave all power to Michael;
And when I woke he'd seen to our repairs.
Wilfred Owen(1893-1918)
I dreamed kind Jesus fouled the big-gun gears;
And caused a permanent stoppage in all bolts;
And buckled with a smile Mausers and Colts;
And rusted bayonet with His tears.
And there were no more bombs, of ours or Theirs,
Not even an old flint-lock, nor even a pikel.
But God was vexed, and gave all power to Michael;
And when I woke he'd seen to our repairs.
Wilfred Owen(1893-1918)
Book review-Excursion to hell by Vince Bramley
Read this Excellent book!The true story of 3 Paras battle on Mount Longdon during the Falklands War in 1982,told by one who was there.
Wait for it- that's the advice for new fathers
Read this I've been saying it for years!-This is the reason we should be allowed to keep a mistress!!!
New speed limit plan introduced!
French bashing
The French tennis open for this year has been canceled due to the National crisis-They have plenty of rackets-But no balls!!
On this day
1789-Mutiny survivor Captain William Bligh and 18 sailors fromHMS Bountyarrive in Timor after sailing 4000 miles in an open boat-"Mutiny Mr Christian!"
1777-Stars and stripes adopted by congress as the flag of theUnited States of America
1982-The Falklands War ends with the surrender of the Argentine Army atPort StanleyWhen we still had a Navy!
1777-Stars and stripes adopted by congress as the flag of theUnited States of America
1982-The Falklands War ends with the surrender of the Argentine Army atPort StanleyWhen we still had a Navy!
The Ad Lav club
Amnesty plan for 500,000 illegal migrants
Read this Spineless cowards!-Just throw all the freeloading scumbags out!!!
Skeleton 'may have had wolf-fang dentures'
Moscow tries to stop men drinking perfume and nail-varnish remover!
Read this Have you tasted Red stripe?-Give me a bottle of old spice any day!
Why you should always remember-Bullets bounce!
Outrage over another lenient sentence for paedophile!l
Security fears over Britain's 'open gateway' ports
Read this An utter discrace!-When is the "Politburo"going to start doing its job and protect this countries border?
'Darling, there's an alligator at the door'!
Read this That's nothing-I have them in my garden all the time,except they're the smaller "Squirrel" type alligator(Very dangerous to nuts)!
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Prescott in the hot tub!
Derek and Clive monkeys!
Thought of the day
The quickest way to stop your girlfriend giving you a blowjob is to marry her!
New Anti-Congestion charge dodgers plan introduced in London!
Just because you wear red spandex undies doesn't mean you're gay!
Read this I beg to differ-It means you're a screaming faggot!!!
Coffee may cut alcohol damage!
No music, no dancing, no football as Muslim law takes over from reign of the warlords!
Read this Looks like another bunch of medieval,brainwashed,psychotic nutters for us to sort out!
I'd shoot the pair of them just for looking like that!
Book Review- Mr. Midshipman Easy by Captain Marryat
Read this Hilarious book!Considering it was written over 150 years ago,it can still enthrall the reader.In a nutshell it's the story of Jack Easy,a young lad who joins Nelson's navy and learns about life through a series of hilarious adventures.
Ambushed on patrol
French bashing-Why,'cos they're French!
Question: How do you confuse a French soldier?
Answer: Give him a rifle and ask him to fire it!
Answer: Give him a rifle and ask him to fire it!
On this day
Geramany launches first V1 rocket attack against Britain-1944Read this The original cruise missile!
Pioneer 10 beacame the first manmade object to leave the solar system-1983Read this To boldly go where no "object" has gone before!
Michael Jackson cleared of charges of child molestation-2005Read this Sex case,Sex case Hang him,Hang him,Hang him!!!
Pioneer 10 beacame the first manmade object to leave the solar system-1983Read this To boldly go where no "object" has gone before!
Michael Jackson cleared of charges of child molestation-2005Read this Sex case,Sex case Hang him,Hang him,Hang him!!!
First British fatality of Afghan mission named
US
Naval base has 19 warships in mothballs and just 16 on active service
Read this Here's a thought-Why not re-commision them and then we can have a proper size navy!
Miracle of John the Baptist's hand
Turkey's worst head our way!
Read this That's all we need-300,000 knife carrying,islamic psycho nutters being allowed to settle in the UK!
Monday, June 12, 2006
New border control at Channel tunnel!
Final fight to save 1066 battlefield
Read this This cannot happen!!!
The English losses at theBattle of Fulfordwere a major reason for the English defeat at Hastings in 1066 and the battlefeild deserves to be saved for the nation.
The English losses at theBattle of Fulfordwere a major reason for the English defeat at Hastings in 1066 and the battlefeild deserves to be saved for the nation.
French bashing-New film out!
Book review- Operation Certain Death by Damien Lewis
Read this Amazing book-Why isn't this story a film yet?The true story of the SAS/SBS/Para hostage rescue of eleven British soldiers captured by psycho nutters in Sierra Leone!
On this day
South Africa sends Nelson Mandela to prison for life-1964Read this Should have kept him in!
Anne Frank recieves a diary for her thirnteenth birthday-1942Read this
Gregory Peck died- 2003Read thisAnother one bites the dust!
Anne Frank recieves a diary for her thirnteenth birthday-1942Read this
Gregory Peck died- 2003Read thisAnother one bites the dust!
Combat in Fallujah
British soldier in Afghanistan is killed by Taliban
Read this
If I should die, think only this of me:
That there's some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever England. There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;
A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,
Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,
A body of England's, breathing English air,
Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away,
A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
Gives somewhere back the thoughts by England given;
Her sights and sounds; dreams happy as her day;
And laughter, learnt of friends; and gentleness,
In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.
By Rupert Brooke(1887-1915)
If I should die, think only this of me:
That there's some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever England. There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;
A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,
Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,
A body of England's, breathing English air,
Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.
And think, this heart, all evil shed away,
A pulse in the eternal mind, no less
Gives somewhere back the thoughts by England given;
Her sights and sounds; dreams happy as her day;
And laughter, learnt of friends; and gentleness,
In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.
By Rupert Brooke(1887-1915)
Reid: Just stop moaning, take on the yobs yourselves!
"Reid" this And get banged up by the old Bill as soon as we did anything-Stupid Scottish,Commie twat!
Britain faces mass migration, warns Admiral!
Amerika
Ministry of Defence Voicemail message
Thank you for calling the British Army, I'm sorry but all of our units are out at the moment or are otherwise engaged. Please leave a message with your country, name of organisation, the region, the specific crisis and a number at which we can call you. As soon as we have sorted out the Balkans, Iraq, Northern Ireland, Afghanistan, marching up and down bits of tarmac in London and compulsory Equal Opportunities training, we will return your call.
Please speak after the tone, or if you require more options, please listen to the following numbers:
If your crisis is small and close to the sea, press 1 for the Royal Marines.
If your concern is distant, with tropical climate and good hotels and can be solved by one or two low risk bombing runs, please press # for the Royal Air Force. Please note this service is not available
after 1630 hours or at weekends.
If your enquiry concerns a situation which can be resolved by a grey funnel, some bunting, flags, a damn good cocktail party and a first class marching band, please write, well in advance, to the First Sea Lord, The Ministry of Defence, Whitehall, London SW1.
If your enquiry is not urgent, please press 2 for the Allied Rapid Reaction Corps.
If you are in real, hot trouble please press 3 and your call will be routed to Sandline International.
If you are interested in joining the Army and wish to be shouted at, paid little, have premature arthritis in both knees, put your wife and family in a condemned hut miles from civilisation and are prepared to work your a**e off daily, risking life and limb in all weathers and terrain, both day and night while watching the Treasury
erode your original terms and conditions of service, then please stay on the line. Your call will shortly be connected to a bitter passed-over Recruiting Sergeant in a grotty shop behind the railway station.
Have a pleasant day and thank you again for trying to contact the British Army
Please speak after the tone, or if you require more options, please listen to the following numbers:
If your crisis is small and close to the sea, press 1 for the Royal Marines.
If your concern is distant, with tropical climate and good hotels and can be solved by one or two low risk bombing runs, please press # for the Royal Air Force. Please note this service is not available
after 1630 hours or at weekends.
If your enquiry concerns a situation which can be resolved by a grey funnel, some bunting, flags, a damn good cocktail party and a first class marching band, please write, well in advance, to the First Sea Lord, The Ministry of Defence, Whitehall, London SW1.
If your enquiry is not urgent, please press 2 for the Allied Rapid Reaction Corps.
If you are in real, hot trouble please press 3 and your call will be routed to Sandline International.
If you are interested in joining the Army and wish to be shouted at, paid little, have premature arthritis in both knees, put your wife and family in a condemned hut miles from civilisation and are prepared to work your a**e off daily, risking life and limb in all weathers and terrain, both day and night while watching the Treasury
erode your original terms and conditions of service, then please stay on the line. Your call will shortly be connected to a bitter passed-over Recruiting Sergeant in a grotty shop behind the railway station.
Have a pleasant day and thank you again for trying to contact the British Army
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Leaving on a jet plane!
I'm off on my hols today,so no blogging for a while,flying out to find the sun-Last reported somwhere in the Med!Back Sunday week,enjoy the rain in Blighty! Scipio
Deadly serious - or gallows humour?
Book review-Cochrane by Robert Harvey
Read this This bloke was a nutter!!!The true story of one of Nelson's captains whose life reads like an adventure novel.Patrick O'Brien based his character Jack Aubrey on this lunatic!A true English hero of the old school-Read this book!!
French troops withdraw under heavy fire!
NI numbers for illegal immigrants
On this day
USS Chesapeake captured 1812Read this"Don't give up the ship!"
Rhodesia becomes Zimbabwe 1979Read thisThe day the rot set in!
Marilyn Monroe born 1926Read this Happy birthday Madge!
Rhodesia becomes Zimbabwe 1979Read thisThe day the rot set in!
Marilyn Monroe born 1926Read this Happy birthday Madge!
Smartbomb takes out sniper
Prescott gives up Dorneywood
Read this Finally-Good riddance to bad rubbish-Just resign you useless,Fat ,Northern Git!
Binge-drinking girls outnumber the boys!
Guilty plea could see reduced sentences for rapist!!
Fallujah Halo
